Biology Jokes and Puns

Here are some biology jokes that will have you laughing in your genes! Find your favorite biology puns and then share with others!

Biology jokes and puns

1. What do other plants do when another plant is sad? They photosymphatize.
2. What does a biologist do in their spare time? Go fission.
3. What’s a French biologist’s favorite cheese? Em-Brie-oh 
4. What do you call an organic compound with an attitude? A-mean-o acid.
5. What did the brother cell say to his sister cell when he ran into the table? Mitosis

6. Why do bacteria like to travel? It makes them more cultured.
7. What do hipster biologists wear? Skinny genes.
8. Why wouldn’t the scientist go into the haunted house? He was too petrified
9. Why did the scuba diver fail biology? He was below C level.
10. Did you hear about the microbiologist who traveled to 15 different countries and learned to speak seven languages? He was a man of many cultures.

11. What do you get when you mix picture day with writing a biology essay? photos-and-thesis
12. How do you pass a biology test on excretion? Process of elimination.
13. When a plant is sad, what do other plants do? Photosympathize.
14. Why didn’t anyone want the biologist’s new book? It was a hard cell.
15. What does a biologist tell you when you have to give blood? B positive.

16. Why do biologists look forward to casual Fridays? They’re allowed to wear genes to work.
17. What’s the opposite of Nutrition? Old-trition.
18. Why was the biology teacher so popular at school? He was a fungi.
19. What was the name of the leader of the group of holy biologists? Saint Nucleus.
20. Why did the biologist get booed off the stage during American Idol? He was caught Lipidsynching

21. Why was the amoeba sad? His parents just split.
22. What’s was the pirate favorite amino acid? Arrrrrrr-ginine.
23. Why did the biologist break up with the physicist after the first date? They had no chemistry
24. Why do biologists look forward to casual Fridays? They’re allowed to wear genes to work.
25. What do biologists post on Instagram? Cell-fies.

26. Why did the woman break up with the biologist? He was too cell-fish.
27. Where did the viruses go? They flu away.
28. My Biology teacher told me ants are female The males are called uncles
29. What do you call it when your Biology grade is close to an F? Biodegraded.
30. What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.

31. How does Juliet maintain a constant body temperature? Romeostasis.
32. Do you want to hear a potassium joke? K.
33. What musical instrument do biologists play? Organs
34. What do biologists wear when they play hockey? Helminths.
35. Why was the girl worried about biology class? She has a Nervous System.

36. I told my dad I couldn’t believe I’d failed my biology exam. He said, I’m your mum.
37. What do you call the leader of a biology gang? The nucleus.
38. Why was the periodic table so good at sneaking? It had the element of surprise.
39. What’s the tiniest virus in the world? Smallpox.
40. What did the biology student say when the advisor asked if anyone wanted to be a mortician? Over my dead body!

46. Is there a big difference between male and female anatomy? Yes, a vas deferens.
47. Why did the bacteria cross the microscope? To get to the other slide.
48. What do you call a place of worship made out of amino acids? A cysteine chapel.
49. What do you call the union of a sheep and a ram? A zygoat.
50. Why couldn’t the plants escape prison?  Because their cells were surrounded by walls.

51. What did one brain say to another? I lobe you.
52. What did the Italian marine Biologist say when asked to identify an eel? That’s a moray.
53. What is the easiest way to determine the sex of a chromosome? Pull down its genes!
54. What kind of pants do molecular biologists wear? ​Designer genes.
55. What did one scientist say to the other when he heard his hypothesis? You can’t be cereus?

Biology one liners

61. I don’t think I need a spine. It’s holding me back.
62. I passed my Algebra test today but failed my Biology exam. The aftermath was really difficult.
63. I walked into the biology lab and saw my lab partner dissecting an insect. His fly was open.
64. I made a DNA joke in my biology class but no one laughed. Guess my thymine was off.
65. If you’ve ever wondered how biologists contact each other? They use their cell phones.
66. A couple of biologists had twins. They named one Jessica and the other Control.
67. Today in biology class we were dissecting an eye. I kept thinking of jokes but they were getting cornea and cornea.