Funniest Pizza Jokes – Not AI!

Here is my curated list of pizza puns written by real people, no AI here! Enjoy!

Pizza puns and jokes

1. What did the Dalai Lama say when he walked into a pizza parlor? Make me one with everything.
2. Waiter, will my pizza be long? No, sir, it will be round.
3. What did the aardvark order on his pizza? Ant-chovies.
4. What do carpenters love to put on their pizzas? Saw-sages.
5. Why could the skunk not call for pizza? His phone was out of odour.
6. What did the kid say after eating a frozen pizza? Well, that wasn’t very thawed out.
7. What does a pizza say when it’s afraid? Fold me close.
8. Did you hear about the Italian chef who was sick? He pastaway and now she’s just a pizza history.
9. What do you call a person who can’t decide what kind of pizza to order? Inde-slice-ve.
10. Nothing tops a plain pizza.
11. What do you call a fake pizza? A pepper-phony.
12. What is pizza’s favorite Hollywood movie? Pie Hard.
13. What do pizzas say to express love? Olive you.
14. Why did Jabba win the pizza contest? Because no one out pizzas the Hutt.
15. Why was the pizza maker desperate for business? Because they kneaded the dough.
16. What kind of person doesn’t like pizza? A weirdough.
17. Where does a tired dad order pizza from? Papa Yawns.
18. Where do pepperonis go on holiday? The leaning tower of pizza.
19. What do you call a sleeping pizza? PiZZZa.
20. What is the name of dogs’ favorite pizza? Pupper-runi pizza.
21. What is hairdressers’ favorite type of pizza? Perm-asan.
22. Do you know why the hipster burned her lips? Because she ate pizza before it was cool.
23. Women wear perfume to smell good. And pizzas wear what? Calzone.
24. You have a pizza my heart.
25. May the sauce be with you.
26. You’re a lot like a pizza. No matter how you slice it, you’re good.
27. Why did Dracula run out of the pizza restaurant? Someone put garlic on his pizza dough.
28. What did the pizza slicer say when he wanted to rob the pizza? Hand over the dough or I’ll cut you.
29. Do you want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it’s way too cheesy.
30. What did the pepperoni on the pizza say to the mushroom on the pizza ? Slice to meat you.
31. What does Dr Who eat with their pizza? Dalek bread.
32. What’s a pizza maker’s favorite song? “Slice, Slice Baby.”
33. Olive you so, so much.
34. Calculate the volume of a pizza with r=Z and height. Pi * Z * Z * A
35. Yeah, I’m into fitness. Fitness whole pizza in my mouth.
36. What do a pizza delivery person and a comedian have in common? They have the right stuff but sometimes they get the delivery wrong.
37. Why do people like making lasagna from scratch at home? It’s pretty much a pizza cake.
38. Why was the famous pizza sad? It was always being chased by the pepperazzi.
39. Where do Pharaohs like to eat? Pizza Tut.
40. I’m going to open a restaurant that only serves crabs and pizza. I’ll call it the Crust Station.
41. I burned 2000 calories today. I fell asleep while baking pizza in the oven.
42. Sorry to sound cheesy, but I crust say, you have melted my heart.
43. I wanna tell you something. I a-dough you.
44. What did the chef say about his student’s pizza? There’s mushroom for improvement.
45. What’s the difference between a good pizza joke and a bad one? The delivery.
46. Wood fired pizza? How’s pizza gonna get a job now?
47. How do you fix a broken pizza?  With tomato paste.
48. Why was the pizza chef happy when they didn’t have to work? They had more thyme to spend with their kids.
49. Why was the Hawaiian pizza not cooked? The oven was on aloha temperature.
50. What did the tough pepperoni say? Dough you wanna pizza me?
51. What did a pizza ask its toppings? Are we feta off alone?
52. What do pizzas say when they are surprised? Cheesus Crust.
53. What did parmesan say when it broke up with mozzarella?  I’m sorry, I’m too mature for you.
54. What’s the difference between pizza and pizza jokes? Pizza jokes can’t be topped.
55. What do Homer Simpson and pizza have in common? Doh.
56. Did you hear about the pizza place on the moon? Great pizza, but no atmosphere.
57. Why did the man cut his pizza with a smartphone? It’s cutting edge technology.
58. What type of cheese do dogs love to have on their pizzas? Mutt-zarella.
59. What did the pizza say to the chef when it was thrown onto the pizza? You don’t pepper-own me.
60. Why does the mushroom always get invited to pizza parties? Because he’s such a fungi.