Funniest Cowboy Jokes – Not AI!

Here is my curated list of cowboy puns written by real people, no AI here! Enjoy!

Cowboy puns and jokes

1. What did the cowboy say to the artist? Draw.
2. What do you call a retired old cowboy? De-ranged.
3. What do cowboys make when the sun comes up? Shadows.
4. What do cowboys put on their salads? Ranch dressing.
5. Where do cowboys cook their chili? On the range.
6. Which is a cowboy’s favorite soccer team? Spurs.
7. How do space cowboys wrangle their cattle? A tractor beam.
8. Why did the bowlegged cowboy get fired? Because he couldn’t keep his calves together.
9. How did the cowboy survive the stampede? He had herd immunity.
10. What did the Jedi say to the cowboy? May the horse be with you.
11. What do cowboys say about horse surgeons? They have stable hands.
12. Where does a cowboy take his trusty steed when it’s sick? To the horse-pital.
13. What do you call a bull that fell asleep at the rodeo? A bulldozer.
14. How did the cowboy become so rich? His horse gave him a couple of bucks every day
15. How did the cowboy get to the hockey game? On a Zam-pony
16. Why did the cowboy get so many laughs? Because he was always horsing around.
17. What do you call a cowboy who teaches acting class? A stage coach.
18. Where do cowboys go to think things over? The ponder-osa.
19. What did the cowboy say at his second rodeo? This ain’t my first rodeo.
20. How did the cowboy know his cattle were following him without even looking? He herd them.
21. What do you call an egg white with cowboy boots? A western omelette.
22. Which tree do cowboys love most? The horse chestnut tree.
23. Which kind of dinosaur can be found at a rodeo? A bronco-saurus.
24. Which side of a cowboy has scruffy hair? The outside.
25. Knock Knock. Who’s there? Ya. Ya who? I didn’t know you were a cowboy.
26. What do you call a cowboy with a case of bad gas? Darn tootin’.
27. Why did the cowboy get a hot seat? Because he rode the range.
28. Who is in cowboy films and is always broke? Skint Eastwood.
29. What did the catholic cowboy do when he met the father of the church on his confession visit? He greeted him by saying, “Howdy Pardoner!”
30. Why did the police arrest the cowboy for rustling? The police arrested him because the cowboy secretly took the cattle of his neighbors.
31. How does a cowboy usually greet an equestrian? He simply takes off his hat and says, “Howdy Neigh-bor”.
32. The worst job I ever had was working in a record factory making cowboy records. Howdy pressing.
33. Cowboys don’t roll… They tumble.
34. Cowboys don’t roll joints. They tumble weed
35. A man dies and comes back to life as a cowboy. I call that “reintarnation”
36. I’m a cowboy but my pronouns are Ye/Haw.
37. For their lunch and dinner, where does a cowboy cook the dishes? He usually cooks them on the range!
38. What did the cowboy say to his friend when his beloved dog left him? The first cowboy said, “It’s very unfortunate partner, but my doggone.
39. What do you call a cowboy who helps out in a school? The deputy head
40. If a cowboy rides into town on Friday and three days later leaves on Friday, how does he do it? The horse’s name is Friday.
41. Why all of a sudden, did the cowboy start making a bed made only out of straw? Because he wanted to feed the night mares!
42. What is a perfect way to describe a very happy cowboy? You call him a jolly rancher!
43. Why are cowboy hats curled up on the side? So they can fit three in the pickup.
44. What does a teenage cowboy say when he throws somebody out of the saloon? Yeet haw.
45. Why do cowboys always ride horses? Because they’re far too heavy to carry.
46. How do German cowboys greet each other? Audi, partner.
47. What do ghost cowboys wear? BOO-ts.
48. Why was the cowboy sick when he rode a wild horse in the forest? Because he got affected with bronc-itis!
49. Where were the cowboys driving their cattle to? Upstate Moo York.
50. How do cowboys get a cow to keep quiet? Press the mooooote button.
51. Who do zombie cowboys fight? Deadskins.
52. What special characteristic did the artist cowboy have in his forte? He was excellent at drawing.
53. What do you say when you see a cowboy who has placed his foot across the border of Canada? You say his leg is in Canada, just aboot.
54. Why are cowboys always funny and smiling? Because they get many laughs by simply horsing around!
55. The first job I ever had was ironing cowboy clothes. Howdy pressing.
56. A cowboy shot his wife dead. When asked why he said…
    She broke her ankle.
57. I’m making a new cowboy film called “The Sun”. It is set in the west.
58. A wounded dog walked into the saloon and said, “I’m alookin’ for the man what shot my paw.”
59. Two cowboys are lost in the desert. One cowboy sees a tree that’s draped in bacon. A bacon tree ! We’re saved! He says. He runs to the tree and is shot up with bullets. It wasn’t a bacon tree, it was a ham bush.
60. What do cowboys do to calm down while looking over their cattle? They listen to some country moosic!
61. What sickness did the cowboy get from riding a wild horse? Bronc-it is.
62. Did you hear about the cowboy film about the sun? It’s set in the west.
63. What kind of car does a cowboy drive? Audi.
64. What’s the name of the store where cowboys buy their clothes?  Ranch dressing.
65. Who wrote the book “Talk Like a Cowboy?” Hal D. Yall.
66. Why did the cowboy thief take a bath before every stickup? He wanted to make a clean getaway.
67. What did the cowboy’s barber say? Partner, you’ve got one wicked cowlick.
68. What did the sleep-deprived cowboy say to his cow who was mooing into the wee hours? It’s pasture bedtime.
69. Why did the cowboy decide to quit his job at the rodeo? It was a spur of the moment decision.
70. Why don’t cowboys shoo the flies buzzing around them? It’s easier to let them go bare foot.
71. What’s the time when your cow sits on your cowboy hat? Time to get a new cowboy hat.
72. What do cowboys call midnight? High moon.
73. Why didn’t the vegetarian cowboy complain about anything? They didn’t have any beef.
74. Why did the cowboy get so many laughs? Because he was always horsing around.
75. Where do the cowboys usually feed all their herd of cattle? They usually feed their cattle at the calf-eteria.
76. Why did the rancher name his horse Flattery? Because it got him nowhere.
77. Why did the cow tell the cowpoke to leave her calf alone? She believed children should be seen and not herded.
78. When do vampires like horse racing? When it’s neck and neck.
79. What did the cattle rancher get when he crossed a cow with a goat? A Coat.
80. Why do cowboys always ride horses? Because they’re far too heavy to carry.
81. Did you hear about the cowboy who died with his boots on? He didn’t want to stub his toe when he kicked the bucket.
82. What does it mean when a cowboy finds a horseshoe? His horse is walking around in his socks.
83. What do you call a cowboy who works in finance? The loan arranger.
84. Why was the cowboy sad? He couldn’t giddy-up.
85. How did the cowboy react when he bought a new yo-yo? Well, this ain’t my first yo-yo.
86. Why do cowboys always ride horses? Because they’re far too heavy to carry.
87. Why are so many cowboys also gamblers? Because they always like raising the steaks.
88. What do cowboys tell their cows after an argument? Turn the udder cheek and mooooove on.
89. Why can’t cowboys ever get the right answer in math class? Because they’re always rounding things up.
90. How does a cowboy get a horse to do odd jobs around the farm? By paying him under the stable.