Funny Bacon Jokes – One Liners, Puns + Free Printable

Sit down at the breakfast table and squeal with laughter! These bacon jokes are perfect for telling during a cooked breakfast or at the BBQ.

Flip through, find your favorites, then download the ready-to-cut PDF, its free!

My Top 10

Why did the pig go into the kitchen? He felt like bacon.
What would happen if pigs could fly? The price of bacon would skyrocket.
Why did the pig run naked across the football field? He was streaky bacon.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede? Bacon and legs.
What did bacon tell tomato during breakfast? Lettuce be together.
Why was the meat packer fired? He was bringing home the bacon.
What tree does bacon grow on? Porcupine.
How many vegans does it take to eat a strip of crispy, delicious bacon? Just one, if no one’s looking.
Why did the pig decide to stop sunbathing? He was bacon in the heat.
What’s bacon’s favorite movie? Grease.

Q&A Jokes

What was the name of the horror movie bacon watched? Frankenswine.
Why in the world did the girl pig break up with the boy pig? Because he turned out to be a real boar.
What do you call a farm that sells chickens and pigs? A chicken, bacon, ranch.
Why was the pig rejected? Because he was mistaken bacon.
Why do pigs go to New York City? To see the Big Apple.
What pig is used to make spicy bacon? Peppa pig.
Why was the cruise ship passenger thrown overboard? He was hogging the bacon at the buffet.
What is a pressing thought of every pig? “Why do all kinds of bacon get cooked and cookies get baked?”
Why didn’t anyone want to play ball with the pig? Because he always hogs the ball.
What did the pig kill the farmer? To save his own bacon.
Who was awarded the best-tasted pair? Bacon and egg.
Who was the smartest bacon lover that ever lived? Albert Ein-swine.
What color is the best cooked bacon? Ma-hog-any.
What kind of stories do pigs tell their children? Pig Tales from the Farm.
What will happen if you play tug of war with bacon? You will get pulled pork.
What do you call bacon that’s 100 days old? Ancient grease.
What did the bacon do after school? Its ham-work.
Why did the pig car smell like bacon? Because its porking brake was left on.
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best? Hoggin Daz.
What made the pig and chicken so proud? Because they make the best egg and bacon sandwich.
How is bacon like southern Europe? It’s got a lot of Greece in it.
What do you call a pig that can tell you about his ancestors? History in the bacon.
With what crime was the bacon thief charged? Hamburglary.
What did the boy bacon say to the girl bacon? Girl, you’re bacon my heart melted.
Why did it take the pig hours to cross the road? She was a slow-pork.
Why weren’t bacon and eggs allowed in the restaurant? Because breakfast was not served there.
What did the pig say when he was in the sun? I’m bacon.
What was the name of the bacon movie? Hamlet.
Why did the pig go to the casino? Because he wanted to play the slop machines.
How do they get up there? In pig-up trucks.
What are they warned to watch out for? Pigpockets.
What was the name of the frog’s favorite crisp dish? Croaky bacon.
What’s the best way to eat turkey bacon? Gobble it up.
Does anyone ever try Canadian Bacon? I hear it’s the nicest bacon around.
How do you know it’s hot? When two pigs are at the beach and one says to the other, “I’m bacon.”
Did you hear about the butcher who sat on his bacon slicer? He got a little behind in his deliveries.
Why did the slice of bacon laugh? Because the egg cracked a yolk.
Why did yogurt hate bacon? Because he was uncultured.
What should you use to write secret messages about bacon? Invisible oink.
Why was the piglet consistently whining? He was boared out of his mind.

One Liners

Bacon will kill you, but, smoking bacon will cure it.

Bacon is now both the cause and the solution of our heart problems.

Got attacked by a bacon tree the other day. Turned out to be a ham bush.

Kids Jokes

What do you call a pig that knows karate? He’s a pork chop.
What do you call a pig at the beach? Bacon.
What do you call a pig that has no legs? A groundhog.
What’s bacon’s favorite movie? Grease.
How did the bacon go to hospital? In a ham-bulance.

Free Printable Bacon Jokes

Want these jokes in a cut-out-and-go format? I’ve made a free printable PDF with 10 of the funniest bacon jokes. Perfect for bringing out at a cooked breakfast or placing one on a pack of bacon in the fridge for someone to find. There’s no sign-up needed, just click and instantly download 🙂